living freely – Estelle Brodeur

You Are Never Alone When You Feel Love: Making Connections

In 2003 I traveled to Boston to attend a week-long training at the Benson-Henry Institute for Mind Body Medicine At Massachusetts General Hospital. Having begun a personal healing journey through yoga several years prior, I wanted to bring integrative tools to others in my workplace. This link below, a YouTube 2020 meditation by Peg Baim, represents the essential quality that breathwork and meditation bring to my life: a body-felt sense of wholeness. Ms. Baim is a nurse practitioner and scholar who developed the institute alongside Herbert Benson.

Dr. Benson’s approach, which he coined “The Relaxation Response”, was based on his cardiology research. An approachable, enthusiastic man, he spoke to us during the training about how meditation crossed all spiritual and religious paths, having roots deep into our human experience. He encouraged us to make these practices relevant for those we served. I’ll always remember that wisdom.

I practice tools which allow me grounding, equanimity, and clarity. Even when I stray off the path and go down the road of self-criticism and judgements, I can come back to a practice of self-compassion, which is the way of love. Love for my mind, my body, and each other. That is my experience.

I believe we each experience a sense of our own essential nature in different ways, even the presence of God (or god as you see him/her) in a unique sense. I feel God in my heart center, as love, a resting place of knowing life is eternal, ongoing; a connecting thread to all. I feel God in the presence of those I love dearly, whether that be by video, voice, or in person. I feel God in nature. I feel God in conversations and community.

As I learned to meditate, I began to feel a centering presence in my body and gain an ability to rest there, particularly at the end of an exhale, a sweet place of simple and profound awareness. Peg Baim’s meditations were and still are my favorites; the others are from Olivia Hoblitzelle. Both you can find on music platforms such as Spotify, YouTube, or iTunes.

So here is the Connection Meditation by Ms. Baim, honoring connection with ourselves and those dear. As Ms. Baim says, “You are never alone when you feel love”.

Move the Body, Change the Mind

How many times do we enter a situation and realize we are holding onto an attitude that limits us in some way? These kind of judgements stir about when we’re looking to change a behavior that seems immovable, or are feeling stretched beyond what we feel capable of. One useful way to shift away from this line of thinking is to access body wisdom which can change perspectives and build new habits. I’ve been surprised several times recently in yoga class when a simple adjustment to a familiar pose brought a welcome change. In that moment, my body settled into the pose, experienced it more comfortably, as if I were in an entirely new stance. My negative judgement about the pose was transfomed. A simple example, perhaps, yet it is moments such as these that form our daily lives.

Science now tells us what noted physician William James posited a century ago–that body postures can inform—and yes, transform how we feel. Have you seen the video yet of Amy Cuddy, Harvard business professor? Her research suggests that when we assume power poses to experience situations differently we can achieve positive outcomes. Rather than fake it until you make it, it’s fake it until you become the change you want to be. Consider when you are lacking confidence; perhaps your shoulders are hunched, chest a bit collapsed. When you put your arms on hips and stand like a superhero, how does that feel?

When we want to summon change, we can choose surprisingly accessible tools that bring forth results. Tiny yet powerful adaptations provide doors to other ways of being. May you be open and curious!

Being Alive

Consider this expressive writing prompt: What makes you soar?

Sticktuitiveness

“I’ve learned that next to the atomic bomb, the greatest danger is defeatism, despair, and inadequate awareness of what human beings possess. I feel that any problem that can be defined is capable of being resolved. Out of this has come my conviction that no man knows enough to be a pessimist.” —Norman Cousins

High-impact Experiences

When I read UVA Today earlier this morning, I was reminded of my recent vacation to the North Carolina portion of the Blue Ridge Mountains. Now, first of all, I must tell you that this is partly an area of humor in my marriage, as my husband likes to rib me a bit when I tell others I’m from the mountains of Virginia. He tells folks he’s from the part of Northern Virginia that’s now paved.

What reminded me of my vacation in this article is the concept of high-impact learning, or what some would call “peak” experiences. Our trek last month was special because of it’s simplicity and recreation of an epic trip in 2007 to the Pisgah National Forest. The view at the Shining Rock Wilderness is the photograph on the homepage of my website. During our September 2013 trip, we retraced our steps on hikes, discovered new paths, along streams and ambling rivers. We found swimming holes and towns we thought we knew, and laughed when we were mistaken. We hiked in dense fog, and clear skies. We didn’t even bring our mountain bikes, because I discovered my brakes were inoperable shortly before leaving town. We cooked by the fireside every night, and enjoyed sitting around watching the flames and warming up. We were car camping, and in bear country, so the need to shower and change clothes before getting in the tent added to my sense of adventure for sure.

I took photographs of hay bales, clouds, mountains, the two of us, insects, wildflowers, rocks. I brought home a few geological samples, depicted here. I accidentally erased all of my photographs from the trip, yet all the memories remain. I can feel the fog, the warmth of the fire, hear the laughter and a lot of silent mountain mornings. I can smell the coffee perking on the campstove, the pancakes cooking, the maple syrup oatmeal. I can feel my boots, and the same pair of shorts I wore for a week. Yes, it was high-impact.

Heart Meditations

Repeating a favorite prayer, spiritual passage, poem or affirmation can bring calm and ease into the day. Perhaps there’s one in your memory bank, or one that you’d like to deposit.

Here’s one from the Christian tradition. Choose one that fits you. May your heart be open today to what is possible.

The Prayer of Saint Francis

Lord, make me an instrument of thy peace.

Where there is hatred, let me sow love;

Where there is injury, pardon;

Where there is doubt, faith;

Where there is despair, hope;

Where there is darkness, light;

Where there is sadness, joy.

O divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek

To be consoled as to console,

To be understood as to understand,

To be loved as to love;

For it is in giving that we receive;

It is in pardoning that we are pardoned;

It is in dying to self that we are born to eternal life.

The above text is from Blue Mountain Center of Meditation, a helpful and rich resource for meditation practice.

ME TO WE

“You rarely have time for everything you want in this life, so you need to make choices. And hopefully your choices can come from a deep sense of who you are.” — Fred Rogers, from The World According to Mister Rogers: Important Things To Remember.

This week I am inspired by the service of others, and the power of love joining us together. I am inspired by participants, volunteers, staff, and families at the Victory Summit last Saturday. I am inspired by the recent documentary on Fred Rogers. I am inspired by clients who show courage, openness, and willingness. I am inspired by play in all of these events and experiences.

In more words of Fred Rogers, “Play does seem to open up another part of the mind that is always there, but that, since childhood, may have become closed off and hard to reach. When we treat children’s play as seriously as it deserves, we are helping them feel the joy that’s to be found in the creative spirit. We’re helping ourselves stay in touch with that spirit, too. It’s the things we play with and the people who help us play that make a great difference in our lives.”

Who do you play with? How are play, love, and service connected in your life?

Where are you the boss of yourself?

“I am not afraid of storms for I am learning to sail my ship.”

—Louisa May Alcott

Recently, I read Tina Fey’s memoir Bossypants. I noticed her keen ability to laugh at herself, go toward what gave her purpose, while remaining grounded in fundamentals such as family, integrity, play, hard work, and friendship. As I consider the title Bossypants, I appreciate the words of our children’s preschool teacher which were something to the effect of “You’re the boss of you”. To our children, these words seemed to convey

“YES I CAN DO THIS”.

“I CAN SAY NO”.

“I CAN SAY YES”.

More than that, these words create moments of considerations such as

“I AM CAPABLE”.

“I AM COMPETENT”.

“I AM COURAGEOUS”.

“I HAVE FREEDOM”.

“I CAN CHOOSE”.

Simple and empowering. After all, in our lives, aren’t we driving our own bus, sailing our own boat, steering our car, flying our plane, dancing our dance, singing our song, writing our own story? Where in your life can you experience truth, vibrancy, lightness…these things which allow us to become our own best bosses?

“Never bend your head. Hold it high. Look the world straight in the eye.”

—Helen Keller

“To know what you prefer, instead of humbly saying Amen to what the world tells you that you ought to prefer, is to have kept your soul alive.”

—Robert Louis Stevenson

March Freedom

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA — Stretch of Arizona

In what areas of your life do you live freely?

Restorative Views

Where do you look for renewal? I often return to vistas captured in my camera…many times of mountains. Perhaps it’s because I was born and raised in the Blue Ridge Mountains of Virginia, running through the woods, bathed in fresh air and country dirt. The mountain photo on this site’s home page was taken as my husband and I stood at the entrance to the Shining Rock Wilderness in North Carolina’s Pisgah National Forest. It’s grounding for me to look at the blue hues and remember…the day of hiking, the clear sun on a warm July day, insect sounds, a hawk overhead, and the majesty and breadth of those old hills. So, the restoration comes from not only the experience itself with my favorite hiking partner, but the memory, wrapped in all the years of walking on trails, starting from my early days as a young girl walking on soft beds of pine needles, laid down from generations of tall trees, swaying in the breezes, strong in the moutain soil.