mindfulness – Estelle Brodeur

You Are Never Alone When You Feel Love: Making Connections

In 2003 I traveled to Boston to attend a week-long training at the Benson-Henry Institute for Mind Body Medicine At Massachusetts General Hospital. Having begun a personal healing journey through yoga several years prior, I wanted to bring integrative tools to others in my workplace. This link below, a YouTube 2020 meditation by Peg Baim, represents the essential quality that breathwork and meditation bring to my life: a body-felt sense of wholeness. Ms. Baim is a nurse practitioner and scholar who developed the institute alongside Herbert Benson.

Dr. Benson’s approach, which he coined “The Relaxation Response”, was based on his cardiology research. An approachable, enthusiastic man, he spoke to us during the training about how meditation crossed all spiritual and religious paths, having roots deep into our human experience. He encouraged us to make these practices relevant for those we served. I’ll always remember that wisdom.

I practice tools which allow me grounding, equanimity, and clarity. Even when I stray off the path and go down the road of self-criticism and judgements, I can come back to a practice of self-compassion, which is the way of love. Love for my mind, my body, and each other. That is my experience.

I believe we each experience a sense of our own essential nature in different ways, even the presence of God (or god as you see him/her) in a unique sense. I feel God in my heart center, as love, a resting place of knowing life is eternal, ongoing; a connecting thread to all. I feel God in the presence of those I love dearly, whether that be by video, voice, or in person. I feel God in nature. I feel God in conversations and community.

As I learned to meditate, I began to feel a centering presence in my body and gain an ability to rest there, particularly at the end of an exhale, a sweet place of simple and profound awareness. Peg Baim’s meditations were and still are my favorites; the others are from Olivia Hoblitzelle. Both you can find on music platforms such as Spotify, YouTube, or iTunes.

So here is the Connection Meditation by Ms. Baim, honoring connection with ourselves and those dear. As Ms. Baim says, “You are never alone when you feel love”.

Three A’s for Now

Awareness, Acknowledge, Action

When I was a nurse in a university medical intensive care unit, a large percentage of patients died, or at least it seemed. My memories of those times, our patients, and the team of brilliantly skillful nurses are colorful and vivid to this day. I remember the young man dying of AIDS during the advent of the disease. I remember his full name, his face, the feeling of gowning up and going into his room. I remember the nurse who chose to be his primary caretaker in the unit. I remember a patient who we kept sedated and medically paralyzed in order for him to recover from tetanus. He walked into our unit months later recovered; a tall smiling man who I instantly recognized, never before seeing him conscious or upright. He was so grateful to all of us. I remember many more moments. I remember my comrades, those super smart, adept RNs who were dogged, tenacious, and present in their moment to moment hands on care. I remember Donna who shared her crackers with me when we were not able to leave the patient’s bedside. I remember the sounds of the ventilators, all the equipment. I remember the magical spirit and effect of teamwork. So last night I cried when reading an article about a nurse in the Bronx, caring for ICU patients during this pandemic. I cried out of empathy, and grief our world is experiencing. This morning I danced to George Harrison’s iconic album All Things Must Pass.

My Three A’s for Now are related to my experience, that I am labeling as empathy; empathy as related to compassion; compassion for self, others’ suffering. Empathy helps us connect with our humanity, our fellow human beings in this predictably unpredictable human life. Empathy is an emotional state to become AWARE of, so that we can ACKNOWLEDGE what we are feeling, and as yoga philosophy says, take right ACTION.

Who are you called to be right now, in this moment? How will you acknowledge and gain awareness of what you are experiencing, whether it be sadness, confusion, joy, anger, comfort, laughter, tears, love? We can only change or shift what we are aware of. Mindfulness, paying attention to your thoughts, emotions, body is acknowledgement…because we are already feeling all those things. Why not note them and take action? Action could be taking a breath. Keep it simple. Look deep into what and who really matters to you, what your strengths are, what you know is good and true about yourself. We are a human circle. We all need each other. We are resilient.

Outdoor Discoveries and Getting Grounded

One of my favorite delights is finding an unexpected green space. Since I often travel throughout the country, teaching and mentoring health coaches with the Veterans Health Administration, I keep ears and eyes open for places to walk nearby. Last year, my colleagues and I heard about this trail from one of our Tomah coaching course participants. It was a big win for us! Every day after work we’d head out to the trail, only a few miles from our hotel, and walk or run. Most of the winding trail was amid fields of grain, grasses, a few small farms, a creek, and a lake. The insects were magnificent hovering over the fields, birds soaring, the magic of a nature’s sounds. It’s one of the most memorable walking paths I’ve been on during my travels the past two years.

What new outdoor space might you research? The space could be in your hometown, perhaps during a “staycation”, or on a vacation somewhere else. What’s the value of getting outside? How do you “get grounded” and centered in your daily life, recharge?

Another way to get outside and “get grounded” is to go barefoot. Here’s an excellent article from the Washington Post my sister Summer sent me, since she knows how much I go without shoes as does she (we grew up in the country and most of the time, truly, in the summertime, did not wear shoes).

One of the ways I’ve practiced grounding this summer is to walk in the yard after longer periods at the laptop. During the last two months, I’ve completed over 37 hours of continuing education for certifications and licensure. As much as I love learning from different modes online, I noticed my fatigue after listening to even the best of presentations and most interesting material for me. Without speaking to all the reasons why decreased energy may be the case with prolonged proximity to electronics, I simply knew to get outside. So, I’d simply walk around the yard, noticing my feet as they touched the grass, observing any wind, the sun, clouds, garden. What do you notice when you pay attention to the senses?

Managing, sustaining our energetic bodies is crucial to the fullness of life, as well as performance. How do you sustain your energetic body?

4 Ways To Build Optimism

1. Moving the body.
When you feel “stuck”, then it’s time to embody something different. By this, I mean things like taking a walk, simply standing up, or lifting your arms overhead to stretch. We are built to move, and our bodies need to remain fluid and flexible. Consider small, very small steps to take in this direction and notice the impact on your emotions, outlook. What seems doable, enjoyable, in this moment?
2. Meditation. What if you trusted yourself to know how to do this? It takes practice, yes, and yields great benefits. Even for 5 minutes, consider sitting down and noticing your breath in and out. Or take a walk, and notice your surroundings. Centering prayer, mindfulness, or other traditions provide ways to focus attention, quiet the mind, and cultivate new choices. Ann Cushman says in Moving into Meditation, “But a mindfulness practice is not primarily about getting somewhere else. It’s about opening to where you actually are–to what’s true for your real body, your real life. It’s about entering into the realm of your senses: hearing the rain on the roof and the swish of car tires in the puddles, smelling the soured milk and lemon peel in the garbage disposal.”
3. Go outside. Even if you venture outdoors for 5 minutes to clear your head, you have opened a window of possibility. If it’s raining, why not put on a raincoat, or take an umbrella?
4. Write down your experience. Take 5 minutes and write down what you are experiencing in the moment. Allow yourself to write freely, without concern about punctuation, grammar. Write for your own eyes. Then, if you like, tear it up or keep it. Your choice! Sometimes using the written word to gain clarity is remarkable.

12 Word Meditation Practice in 6 minutes

Fourteen years ago I spent a week in a Boston classroom learning from the dedicated staff of the Benson Henry Institute. Peg Baim, shown here, has continued to inspire me through her foundational audio recordings of meditation practices. Her presence, wisdom, and knowledge provided me grounding and affirmation. Although we briefly met, I have gone back through the years and listened to her recordings over and over. I’ve also shared her work with many clients.

In this video, Ms. Baim demonstrates a twelve-word practice developed by the renowned Buddhist monk, scholar and author Thich Nhat Hanh. The steps are the following:

Sit comfortably.
Each pair of words is practiced with breath, for several rounds each.
Begin the sequence by the following
Breathe in the word “In”, breathe out the word “Out”.
Breathe in the word “Deep”, breathe out the word “Slow”
Breathe in the word “Calm”, breathe out the word “Ease”
Breathe in the word “Smile”, breathe out the word “Release”
Breathe in the word “Present”, breathe out the word “Moment”
Breathe in the word “Wonderful”, breathe out the word “Moment”

Here are the word pairs again:

In, Out

Deep, Slow

Calm, Ease

Smile, Release

Present, Moment

Wonderful, Moment

Clearing Out With Movement, Breath, and Writing

Marie Kondo’s book, The Life-Changing Magic Of Tidying Up was one of my favorites a couple of years ago. A client and I read it together, as I coached him on clearing out and bringing more in of what he wanted in life. The loving attention that Ms. Kondo gives each article of clothing, or anything else, as she decides whether to keep it or give it away is a mindfulness exercise in itself. She asks herself “Does this bring me joy?” as she touches each object.

Christopher Keyes of Outside Magazine also enjoyed Kondo’s writing, taking her directives and creating his own 12 ways to simplify.

One of the ways I work with coaching clients is through movement. This sequence energizes and grounds your intention of clearing and simplifying:

Before beginning this exercise, listen to your body, know your body, love your body. Don’t do anything that causes pain.
Stand in Mountain Pose with your feet on the ground, about hip’s width distance apart. Inhale, bring your shoulders to ears. Open mouth and exhale, release shoulders. Notice how your body feels from toe to head and back down again.
Pretend you are 5 years old and start swinging your arms. Let them flop naturally in front and behind you, as you gently turn your torso and hips.
As your arms are flopping in this wind mill fashion, smile! Let your heels come off the floor and be gentle with the knees. Let them follow the movement of your hips.
Invite your 5 year old self to imagine you are clearing out all that no longer serves you, materially, emotionally, physically. Let your arms and hands pretend that they are physically sweeping those things off of a table or desk top. Let yourself get into it!
Allow your arms to come back by your sides. Take a few deep breaths. Close your eyes if you like, or gaze at the floor a few feet in front of you.
Notice now how your body feels. Imagine your breath moving from toes to head, head to toes.
Sit down for 5 minutes. Breathe in and out.
When you’re ready, write down anything that comes to mind about this movement experience. How will clearing out bring your life more in line with your purpose and values?
Invite yourself to consider the first step toward less clutter, more ease. Keep it simple, now! Perhaps fun, and easy. You may want to write this step down, and commit to when you’d like to start. Who will you tell that this is your intention?

Kindness, Mindfulness For A Healthy Heart

How does kindness shown to you by another change your perspective? One of the biggest gifts we can give is simply offering our presence. In The Sun My Heart, Thich Nhat Hanh writes “Even if you spend a lot of money on gifts for everyone in your family, nothing you could buy them can give us as much true happiness as your gift of awareness, breathing, and smiling, and these precious gifts cost nothing.”

Here are ten simple ways to bring awareness into the day.

Notice the breath in belly and ribs, in and out
Scan your body from head to toe
Look up at the sky
Make eye contact with the person speaking to you
Notice your emotions with a light touch
Smile
While doing simple repetitive tasks, breathe
Eat a meal and invite the nourishment in all your cells
Take a brief walk outside or inside
Notice all thoughts with love

Planting Happiness

When I noticed this seed packet in the hardware store, I was reminded of Rick Hanson’s Hardwiring Happiness in which he discusses the “negativity bias” of the brain, meaning that we humans are built to remember difficult emotions and experiences as a safety mechanism, since we’ve needed that quite a bit to survive throughout time. He suggests, however, that we practice taking in the good, even in small doses, in order to balance this negativity bias. We can choose to savor the moments that are meaningful, pleasurable, or when we notice ease. We can practice in even 30 seconds, by visualizing, saying to ourselves what we are specifically most grateful for in this moment.

Making Friends With Props

FRIENDS WHO PROP YOU UP — Friends Who Prop You Up

How do you view yoga props? Do you see them as yoga studio objects used only by those who need them? Let’s challenge our opinions, and subsequent use of props, in the spirit of building a fuller, supported, yes, even dare I say, more robust yoga practice!

What would be different if you could move from “prop judgement” to “prop embrace”? At times, blocks, bolsters, and blankets may seem like materials that hinder rather than help your yoga class experience. Unhealthily challenging oneself by trying to force a position often trumps finding ease, stillness, and breath in the midst of a pose. Embracing props may allow the mind to rest or body to extend in a pose. Props can promote better alignment, use of body’s anatomical wisdom, and actually experience ease more fully. Let’s illustrate this concept of support and ease a bit closer.

Sukasana, or Easy Pose, provides a perfect example. It’s the familiar cross-legged position we often start or end class with, or use for seated meditation. In spite of the pose name, for many, finding comfort in the hips and knees is challenging here. So, why not sit on a block, blanket, or even bolster in order to elevate the hips? This simple method allows the calves, knees, and ankles to move naturally toward the earth through the benefit of gravity. Perhaps the greatest benefit of prop use here is for belly movement. That is, the abdomen can now relax more, therefore helping the breath to move down the torso and fully expand. Try this yourself: sit first in Easy Pose on the carpeted floor or a mat, drop the shoulders, straighten the spine, and notice the breath for 8-9 cycles of inhalation and exhalation. Now, sit on the prop of your choice. Practice the same breath exercise. What do you notice?

Like a theatre prop, a yoga prop can be seen through the lens of helping to create an experience. Even though we are not in a play production or performance in a yoga class, we are, indeed, intentionally building a compassionate atmosphere of body and mind restoration. So, the next time you come to class, invite yourself to pick up a prop you’ve never used, or ask the teacher to help you use it in a particular pose. Demonstrate your courageous self and move towards flow and discovery in a familiar pose, in a new, perhaps more open way. Namaste.

Coming to the Senses

digital roots

The human body receives constant sensory input that provides up to the second information about the world around us. This is great news! And thankfully, we are created to modulate these responses. So, how can we use this amazing instrument, the human body, and play healthier music within? Intentionally noticing the five hard-wired senses gives us opportunities to do just this.

Whether or not you believe in behavioral resolutions this time of year, bringing awareness into our lives is a powerful practice. Why? Because when we go through the motions of the day without noticing how we feel physically or emotionally, stress, body pain, and inflammation occur. Instead, when we tune in and witness what our sensations and reactions are, we can use this information to calm, center, and choose a different response.

Use this simple exercise to practice sensory self-care. Please be patient and compassionate with yourself. Noticing the world around you, your reactions, is a process of change by itself. It takes practice, for all of us, every day, moment by moment.

What sight, sound, touch, smell or taste reminds you of relaxation, comfort, joy… or any other positive emotion or experience that’s linked to your health?

Take a few moments to be still and visualize easy, accessible things you can do to bring pleasant awareness to the senses. Is it listening to a favorite song on the way to work? Enjoying a cup of tea with a friend? Using essential oils? Feeling the feet on the ground as you sit at your desk? Wiggling the toes? Looking up from the laptop and allowing eyes to rest? Taking time to really taste food while chewing? Taking a deep breath? Hugging someone you care about, love? (Remember, to get a hug you’ve got to give one).

Be as specific as you can and write down three things that bring you relaxation for each sense. Before you begin, take a few deep breaths. As you hold your pen, or write on your laptop, drop shoulders away from ears. You may want to write about or focus on one sense each week, or each day. Do what “makes sense” to you!

Sight

Sound

Touch

Smell

Taste

After you complete the exercise, even if you haven’t actually done any of these things yet, check in with yourself and notice your mood. What do you notice? How’s your body feel, compared to when you began this writing or visualization exercise?

Incorporate with any meditation practice and en-joy coming to your senses.